Jan gaan dood, kom in die hel aan. Duiwel: Drink jy?
Jan: Ja!
Duiwel: Maandae drink ons heeldag.
Jan: Nice!
Duiwel: Rook jy?
Jan: Ja!
Duiwel: Dinsdae rook ons heeldag.
Jan: Baie nice!
Duiwel: Dobbel jy?
Jan: Ja!
Duiwel: Woensdae dobbel ons heeldag.
Jan: Great!
Duiwel: Doen jy drugs?
Jan: Ja!
Duiwel: Donderdae doen ons heeldag drugs.
Jan: Fantasties!
Duiwel: Is jy gay?
Jan: Nee.
Duiwel: Ooeee... jy gaan Vrydae haat!
Man kom tuis om te sien hoe sy vrou haar tasse pak. Ek gaan Durban toe," sê sy. "Ek hoor daar is mans wat R200 betaal vir wat ek verniet vir jou doen."
Die man dink vir ‘n oomblik, en begin in stilte sy tas ook te pak.
En wat maak jy nou?" wil sy vrou weet.
Ek gaan saam," se die man. "Ek wil graag sien hoe jy leef op R400 'n jaar!
Drie
vrouens, n blondine, n brunet en rooikop word gestrand op n eiland.
Die brunet skat dis so 20km na die vasteland toe en besluit om nie haar
tyd te mors nie en te swem. Sy swem 5km en raak toe moeg...en by 10km
toe is sy so moeg sy verdrink. Die rooikop wonder of die brunet dit
gemaak het en besluit om die kans te vat. Sy swem 10km voor sy moeg raak
maar by 15km is sy so moeg dat sy verdrink. Die blondine sit nou
alleen en wonder of die twee dit gemaak het. Sy weet sy is nogals fiks
en dink sy sal maar ook swem. Sy swem 5km...toe 10km...toe 15km....en
by 19km besluit sy ..."Joh ek is nou te moeg...gaan maar terug swem!" A
young female teacher was giving her class of six year olds a quiz
"behind my back I've got something red, round and you can eat it. what
is it?" she asked. "an apple" replied little Raymond "no," said the
teacher " it's a tomato but it shows what you are thinking.""I've now got something round, a greenish colored you can eat it." "An apple," replied little Ian "No it's an onion, but it shows what you are thinking."
Little scruffy Johnny at the back of the class says "I've got something under my desk that's an inch long, white and it has a red end." "Dirty little boy," said the teacher "No it's a match, but it shows what you are thinking," he answered.
A
mother-in-law stopped by unannounced at her son's house. She knocked
on the door then immediately walked in and she was shocked to see her
daughter-in-law lying on the couch totally naked. Soft music was
playing and the aroma of perfume filled the room.
"I'm waiting for Mike to come home from work," the daughter-in-law answered.
"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.
"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.
"Love dress? But you're naked!"
"Mike loves me and wants me to wear this dress," she explained. It excites him to no end. Every time he sees me in this dress he instantly becomes romantic and ravages me for hours on end. He can't get enough of me"
The mother-in-law left. When she got home she undressed, showered, put on her best perfume, dimmed the lights, put on a romantic CD, and lay on the couch waiting for her husband to arrive.
Finally her husband came home. He walked in and saw her lying there so provocatively. "What are you doing?" he asked.
"This is my love dress," she whispered sensually.
"Needs ironing," he said. "What's for dinner?
"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.
"Love dress? But you're naked!"
"Mike loves me and wants me to wear this dress," she explained. It excites him to no end. Every time he sees me in this dress he instantly becomes romantic and ravages me for hours on end. He can't get enough of me"
The mother-in-law left. When she got home she undressed, showered, put on her best perfume, dimmed the lights, put on a romantic CD, and lay on the couch waiting for her husband to arrive.
Finally her husband came home. He walked in and saw her lying there so provocatively. "What are you doing?" he asked.
"This is my love dress," she whispered sensually.
"Needs ironing," he said. "What's for dinner?
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